Sunday, January 08, 2017

My quest for sane adults in Congress

In this time of national need, I have recently embarked on a search for sane adults in Congress.

The logical place to look seemed to be among the dozens of Congressional caucuses.

In particular I was looking for a few legislators devoted to adult, sane, non-partisan behavior.

The Senate, I have learned, has no caucuses at all. In the upper house, gatherings of like-minded solons are called “coalitions.”

So let’s mine the lode of caucuses in the “People’s Chamber” in our quest for sane adult nuggets.

The Wikipedia entries were instructive but not particularly reassuring. Vis.

There were the predictable “single-issue” caucuses. So we have “The Atlantic Offshore Energy Caucus,” and the “Carbonated and Non-alcoholic Caucus,” the “Direct Selling Caucus,” the “Electromagnetic Caucus,” the “Cut Flower Caucus” and the “Hockey Caucus.” There’s even a “Baby Caucus,” which is bracketed alphabetically by the “Azerbaijan Caucus” and the “Bangladesh Caucus,” which itself is followed “The Baseball Caucus” and “The Battlefield Caucus.”

As Dave Barry would say, I am NOT making this up.

If this swarm of caucuses are anything more than accounts for campaign contributions. it’s a wonder that Congress gets anything done at all.

Here’s the closest I could come to a caucus for adult sanity:

Congress has three mental health caucuses. The generic “Mental Health Caucus,” the “Men’s Mental Health Caucus” (particularly useful in weighing Trump cabinet nominees and Trump himself) and the “Military Mental Health Caucus” (also known to insensitive, politically incorrect wags as the “Catch-22 Caucus.”)

There is also the timely “Sexual Assault Prevention Caucus” and the “Caucus to End Bullying.”  In a just, sane and adult world, much needed presidential impeachment initiatives would emerge from these groups.

Other promising groups are the “Problem Solvers Caucus” “the Peacekeeping Caucus,” “the Innovation and Human Condition Caucus,” (“innovative” hacking alert!} and, the “Invasive Species Caucus” including, one would hope, invasive species of the human kind.

One obvious problem exposed by my research is a lack of focus. Accordingly I’m recommending an emergency consolidation of some of these groups into the “Sane, adult legislators caucus.”

I predict it will be a small group, but you have to begin somewhere — and FAST!

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